I'm sure someone out there has done a balls up of equal proportions or have i just left myself open for everyone to take the p!ss!
My Major Balls up of the Day!! Can You Beat It??
Moderator: martauto
Well in all my excitement of finally having the correct ally flywheel for my car i rushed the engine back in and got everything plugged in and tightened up. Got in to start it up pressed the clutch peddle out of habit and smack, wouldn't budge! Looked up to see a nice clean box sat on my dash which contained a nice new clutch release bearing that i'd forgetten to fit
so got to do it all again on Sunday!
I'm sure someone out there has done a balls up of equal proportions or have i just left myself open for everyone to take the p!ss!
I'm sure someone out there has done a balls up of equal proportions or have i just left myself open for everyone to take the p!ss!
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fuzzy
- He who sleeps with "Gingers"
- Posts: 14351
- Joined: Sat Jun 04, 2005 11:00 pm
- Location: melbourne Australia
are you sure your not the 'specialist' that did my engine conversion ?Kedge wrote:Well in all my excitement of finally having the correct ally flywheel for my car i rushed the engine back in and got everything plugged in and tightened up. Got in to start it up pressed the clutch peddle out of habit and smack, wouldn't budge! Looked up to see a nice clean box sat on my dash which contained a nice new clutch release bearing that i'd forgetten to fitso got to do it all again on Sunday!
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I'm sure someone out there has done a balls up of equal proportions or have i just left myself open for everyone to take the p!ss!
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march109
- Engaged to the E30 Zone

- Posts: 6632
- Joined: Sun Aug 20, 2006 11:00 pm
- Location: Bournemouth
- Contact:
I once text my missus with an (innocent) message for my ex!
a week later the ex was consolling a newly single me. Small consolation as the girlfriend who flew off the handle at nothing might have been a nutter but I loved her.
a week later the ex was consolling a newly single me. Small consolation as the girlfriend who flew off the handle at nothing might have been a nutter but I loved her.
325i Tech 1 Touring, breaking.
2.5 high comp. M20, 3.64 LSD, Fully undersealed, Spax springs & Bilstein shocks, s/s exhaust, Alpina rep wheels and more.
2.5 high comp. M20, 3.64 LSD, Fully undersealed, Spax springs & Bilstein shocks, s/s exhaust, Alpina rep wheels and more.
If i was i'd probably of forgotten pretty soon afterfuzzy wrote:are you sure your not the 'specialist' that did my engine conversion ?Kedge wrote:Well in all my excitement of finally having the correct ally flywheel for my car i rushed the engine back in and got everything plugged in and tightened up. Got in to start it up pressed the clutch peddle out of habit and smack, wouldn't budge! Looked up to see a nice clean box sat on my dash which contained a nice new clutch release bearing that i'd forgetten to fitso got to do it all again on Sunday!
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I'm sure someone out there has done a balls up of equal proportions or have i just left myself open for everyone to take the p!ss!
- tommype30cab
- E30 Zone Newbie

- Posts: 165
- Joined: Sun Aug 27, 2006 11:00 pm
- Location: The moon
i once filled the flywheel inspection hole on a mk2 golf gearbox with 2 litres of gearbox oil...that then went all over the floor and made me swear, the clutch slipped for weeks
today's biggest balls up was getting out of bed it seems...
today's biggest balls up was getting out of bed it seems...
"Racing is life. Anything that happens before or after is just waiting" Steve Mcqueen
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fuzzy
- He who sleeps with "Gingers"
- Posts: 14351
- Joined: Sat Jun 04, 2005 11:00 pm
- Location: melbourne Australia
your just beginning max. the future holds much worse than that im sure. i only class something as a f**k up if you cant fix it or cover it up before someone else finds out.maxfield wrote:I did once cross thread all the wheel bolts on a Chrysler PT Cruiser... Worse mistake I've ever made I would say...
anything else i put down as a practice shot.
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E30BeemerLad
- Married to the E30 Zone

- Posts: 16806
- Joined: Mon Mar 28, 2005 11:00 pm
- Location: Norfolk
Dave, that's a quality fcuk up mate
I'm sure i'll match it when i do my engine conversion
I'm sure i'll match it when i do my engine conversion
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gareth
- E30 Zone Team Member

- Posts: 11009
- Joined: Tue Jan 11, 2005 11:00 pm
- Location: hastings, east sussex
i've changed the gearbox on a mk2 escort before, only to realise once it was all fitted that i'd taken the broken one off... then refitted it
replace the diff on my 335i and once the old one was off (6pm on a sunday) i notice i'd bought a small case so fit it anyway
err, not take my spare (noisy, medium case) diff to santa pod, then blow said small case diff on the second run
replace the diff on my 335i and once the old one was off (6pm on a sunday) i notice i'd bought a small case so fit it anyway
err, not take my spare (noisy, medium case) diff to santa pod, then blow said small case diff on the second run
Sole founder of Fe2O3-12V it's a lifestyle

LSD rebuilding / modification services provided, PM for details

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Oh yes he who laughs lastE30BeemerLad wrote:Dave, that's a quality **** up mate![]()
I'm sure i'll match it when i do my engine conversion
- gooner1
- Out humping Reindeer
- Posts: 13280
- Joined: Fri Apr 14, 2006 11:00 pm
- Location: Northampton.For my sins.
Not quite the same but i recently travelled all the way to Kent from N,pton straight from a nightshift to collect a hardtop for my cab.Paid 500 sovs for it ,travelled straight back, only to find hardtop was for a e36?.
Mind you i did make a nice little profit on it
Mind you i did make a nice little profit on it

when i fitted my suspension last week i couldn't get a ball joint off si the thread too a (supposedly careful) whack from mr. lump hammer. mashed the thread and ended up having to take the whole control arm off to grind off and dress up the thread.
when i fitted my diff I didn't tighten up the bolts and after two weeks of noises getting worse and worse I realised that the diff was hanging on by ONE bolt.
when changing cam timing I managed to strip numerous rocker cover threads.
i could go on - suffice to say I'm a liability with cars
when i fitted my diff I didn't tighten up the bolts and after two weeks of noises getting worse and worse I realised that the diff was hanging on by ONE bolt.
when changing cam timing I managed to strip numerous rocker cover threads.
i could go on - suffice to say I'm a liability with cars
E46 M3 CSL but dreaming of another E30.
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gareth
- E30 Zone Team Member

- Posts: 11009
- Joined: Tue Jan 11, 2005 11:00 pm
- Location: hastings, east sussex
while angle grinding a rusty mk1 escort once, my bro set light to the crotch area on his overallsNelly wrote:I normally catch, trap, cut, graze, bruise body parts when working on motors but, 'NEVER' my balls
Sole founder of Fe2O3-12V it's a lifestyle

LSD rebuilding / modification services provided, PM for details

LSD rebuilding / modification services provided, PM for details
A mate of mine fitted new calipers to his Rs Turbo, and didnt bother to press the flexi brake pipes into the clips on the struts. (Hes an electrician)
He then took it for a little test thrash and got to the end of a pretty fast straight and,
no brakes.
The flexis had worn through on the wheels. Lucky his handbrake was ok. He also left his caliper bolts slack once on another car he had.
I think he should stick to wires.
He then took it for a little test thrash and got to the end of a pretty fast straight and,
The flexis had worn through on the wheels. Lucky his handbrake was ok. He also left his caliper bolts slack once on another car he had.
I think he should stick to wires.

'99 E39 M5
'93 E34 525ix Touring
Remeber the nightmare we had replacing the trailing arm hoshy?
BMW E30 2.0 Convertible (M52B28)
BMW E30 2.0 2 Door (M20B28 Turbo project to start)
BMW E36 328i Sport (M52B28 Turbo Project)
http://www.e30zone.net/modules.php?name ... ic&t=68663
BMW E30 2.0 2 Door (M20B28 Turbo project to start)
BMW E36 328i Sport (M52B28 Turbo Project)
http://www.e30zone.net/modules.php?name ... ic&t=68663
that quote is incompleteOh yes he who laughs last
he who laughs last thinks slowest....... at least that explains a lot about me
i poured engine oil flush into the power steering reservior on my e30, unsurprisingly i had to drain the whole freakin system..... hey ho, i blame my dad becuase i was busy talking to him, amazing the stuff you can find in the back of an ambulance to drain the reservior figured it was worth doing to be honest because the atf that was in the power steering system instead of bein a sort of cherry red was near black, so i suppose it needed doing
actually further to my previous quote, i guess it runs int he family, my old man helped my uncle do some sort of engine work on his car (i forget the spceifics) got the engine back in, and it wouldnt start
so they try to bump start it by towing it..... after an hour of that and knackering out the clutch, they then re-inspected their work and realised they hadnt attached the electricals up to the engine
so they try to bump start it by towing it..... after an hour of that and knackering out the clutch, they then re-inspected their work and realised they hadnt attached the electricals up to the engine
lol - yeah. and I just this second posted up on another thread that it's not *too* hard to do.. It's just if hoshy is at the spanners jobs tend to take a lot longerQuaser wrote:Remeber the nightmare we had replacing the trailing arm hoshy?
I reckon working in pitch darkness didn't help too much either!
Still - got it done in the end and if I ever do another one it'll take a fraction of the time I reckon. Even figured out the handbrake setup.
E46 M3 CSL but dreaming of another E30.
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gareth
- E30 Zone Team Member

- Posts: 11009
- Joined: Tue Jan 11, 2005 11:00 pm
- Location: hastings, east sussex
i know someone who got a new engine fitted to a transit by a ford dealer under warranty. 3 miles up the road, it siezed! the garage forgot to fill the oil and had messed up the oil pressure sender wiring so he didn't know!

Sole founder of Fe2O3-12V it's a lifestyle

LSD rebuilding / modification services provided, PM for details

LSD rebuilding / modification services provided, PM for details
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Jesus325iTouring
- Frog freak !

- Posts: 11356
- Joined: Sun Jan 09, 2005 11:00 pm
- Location: Omnipresent!
When Scott and I put my new engine in we retained the 5 series gearbox as it appeared exactly the same,but oh no,the prop shaft holes were 2 mm different to the gearbox output shaft
Whole lot had to come back out
I've also rebuilt the front brake on my R5 before an MOT,whilst in the waiting room,the inspector comes in the room.........
"Roger,come and have a look at this"
He then shows me the 10" of side ways movement my front wheel had,I forgot to do the hub bolt up which had nearly worked it's way off completely,he then sent me back in the waiting room to be ashamed of myself whilst he got one of his monkey's to tighten and torque it back up.
Also forgot to do wheel nut up on my big hill billy trailer,first I knew of it was when the wheel fell off 5 miles down the road,nice gouge left in the road now
I've also had the front wheel fall off a Mini.........see above.............again
Note to self,do hub & wheel bolts up
I've also rebuilt the front brake on my R5 before an MOT,whilst in the waiting room,the inspector comes in the room.........
"Roger,come and have a look at this"
He then shows me the 10" of side ways movement my front wheel had,I forgot to do the hub bolt up which had nearly worked it's way off completely,he then sent me back in the waiting room to be ashamed of myself whilst he got one of his monkey's to tighten and torque it back up.
Also forgot to do wheel nut up on my big hill billy trailer,first I knew of it was when the wheel fell off 5 miles down the road,nice gouge left in the road now
I've also had the front wheel fall off a Mini.........see above.............again
Note to self,do hub & wheel bolts up

X5 V8 for thrills, CRV for chills, Range Rover P38 V8 for sooooo much aggravation...
Whilst working in a garage as a sprayer i got one of my panel beater mates to help me empty and fix the gun cleaning machine which is full of thinners.After that he returned to welding a car,ok it was a very short return to welding as he quickly went up in flames. 
i once owned a mk3 escort ghia
after a visit to a petrol station in a rush i went and paid and my mate filled her up after a very sharp exit of said petrol station the car started knocking/banging/smoking i thought i had blew it up so i got it back to dads unit popped an xr2 engine in it
and it wouldnt start my old man walks passed takes a sniff and says thats got diesel in it needless to say i have never lived it down
i have ran out of diesel in my wagon twice in 1 day cost the gaffer £1300 in recovery its a car transporter and couldnt get under the canopies i had a lockdown behind my cab (no keys locked handbrake on) so i couldnt unload to go in
and just last week i pulled the wrong lever on my car transporter and crushed the bonnet of a 07 plate chrysler 300d that will be another 900 pounds please mr boss man
i have ran out of diesel in my wagon twice in 1 day cost the gaffer £1300 in recovery its a car transporter and couldnt get under the canopies i had a lockdown behind my cab (no keys locked handbrake on) so i couldnt unload to go in
and just last week i pulled the wrong lever on my car transporter and crushed the bonnet of a 07 plate chrysler 300d that will be another 900 pounds please mr boss man
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goosiegander
- Zonegoose
- Posts: 2544
- Joined: Sun Nov 19, 2006 11:00 pm
- Location: East Anglia
finding out i had a 2 litre head gasket when i needed a 2.5
After i bolted the head back on
After i bolted the head back on
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kev_skyline
- E30 Zone Newbie

- Posts: 63
- Joined: Wed Aug 22, 2007 11:00 pm
- Location: Dublin
went and bought a 318is a few weeks ago, four hours later said 318 had a new grill in the form of a steel bench that was parked infront of a wall, car is pretty much a write off now and i dont know what to do at all.

I rebuilt the engine of the Nissan 200sx I had.
I fitted engine, started it up. There was a very slight knocking noise at about 2500rpm.
Engine back out.
I'd put the centre main bearing in upside down, as there is an oil hole in one shell and not in the other, so parts of the crank were starved of oil.
Corrected that, engine back in and started.
A mile up the road, death rattle! LOUD death rattle
Engine back out, I'd forgotten to tighten the big end nuts this time!

I fitted engine, started it up. There was a very slight knocking noise at about 2500rpm.
Engine back out.
I'd put the centre main bearing in upside down, as there is an oil hole in one shell and not in the other, so parts of the crank were starved of oil.
Corrected that, engine back in and started.
A mile up the road, death rattle! LOUD death rattle
Engine back out, I'd forgotten to tighten the big end nuts this time!
Jeremy Clarkson wrote:...but it drives the front wheels. Theee wrooong wheels!
da4x4turbo wrote:I raced a vivaro on the motorway once in a 318is.... and lost!!!
- buster
- E30 Zone Addict

- Posts: 3779
- Joined: Sun Jan 09, 2005 11:00 pm
- Location: Near middlesbrough,Teesside
LOL , i once did that !!!tommype30cab wrote:i once filled the flywheel inspection hole on a mk2 golf gearbox with 2 litres of gearbox oil...that then went all over the floor and made me swear, the clutch slipped for weeks![]()
today's biggest balls up was getting out of bed it seems...
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gareth
- E30 Zone Team Member

- Posts: 11009
- Joined: Tue Jan 11, 2005 11:00 pm
- Location: hastings, east sussex
well done, give yourself a pat on the back!!!DRIFTBOY wrote:I rebuilt the engine of the Nissan 200sx I had.
I fitted engine, started it up. There was a very slight knocking noise at about 2500rpm.
Engine back out.
I'd put the centre main bearing in upside down, as there is an oil hole in one shell and not in the other, so parts of the crank were starved of oil.
Corrected that, engine back in and started.
A mile up the road, death rattle! LOUD death rattle
Engine back out, I'd forgotten to tighten the big end nuts this time!![]()
i've just remembered another one, fit a high lift cam to a stage 3 pinto head in a mk2 RS2000, refit the head, fit the cambelt, turn over and check for valve clearance... all ok. then set the timing on the vernier pulley as it was way out. when i started the engine there was a punny plink plink plink noise as all of my new big inlet valves were just clipping the pistons
Sole founder of Fe2O3-12V it's a lifestyle

LSD rebuilding / modification services provided, PM for details

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